Why do I continue to do what I do?

So lately I have been wondering if youth ministry is where God still wants me to be, or if I should do something else for a while. This is not the first time, it goes in waves. And I'm sure it's not the only profession where people ask this question. I'm sure my brother ( a teacher) or my friend (a social worker) or my friend (a bartender) etc all ask themselves the same question. Luckily when I'm not sure of the answer...God IS! God has many times (not always, but a lot of the time) spoken to me through music. Lately (as I said) I had been questioning if I was suppose to still be doing this, and trying to find motivation to do my job, and then God spoke. He had me pop in the Kutless CD I had recently purchased for the youth group but hadn't listened to yet. The CD is called Hearts of the Innocent and the first song is the title track. As I listened to the words of that song I was reminded why I am a youth minister in the church, and why (even though I question it a lot) I can not imagine doing anything else!

Hearts of the Innocent

by Kutless

I'm looking down into the eyes of hopelessness

They're crying out to me

I see the pain it's so much more than youth should know

It tears me apart

What can I do to change what I see

This vicious cycle must come to an end

[CHORUS:]Can't you see, we're crushing the hearts of the innocent

We're teaching them to fail

And how it breaks me to see how we're living and punishing the ones that need us to care

To see them hurting

Feels like knuckles to the back of my head

Where have the days gone that a promise was forever

Families stuck together

We wonder why their generation struggles to get by

There's no one to help what can I do to change what I see

This vicious cycle must come to an end

[CHORUS:]Can't you see, we're crushing the hearts of the innocent
We're teaching them to fail
And how it breaks me to see how we're living and punishing the ones that need us to care
To see them hurting
Feels like knuckles to the back of my head

It breaks my heart to see out youth struggling and feeling so lost. Kids these days are far too grown up and are made to deal with things that I could never imagine when I was their age! Hopefully I can help even a few to know the love and grace of Jesus Christ, and how he loves them where they are at.

1 versus 99

I believe it was a radio program I was listening a few weeks ago. maybe it was just a little 'thought for the day' break on the show. Whatever it was I was listening to, the speaker was talking about the parable of the lost sheep. (Matthew 18: 10-14, Luke 15: 1-7.) If you have ever attended church at some point you are probably familiar with this story that Jesus told. If you aren't familiar with it, here it is from Matthew 18: 1o-14:

"Take care that you do not despise one of these little ones; for, I tell you, in heaven their angels continually see the face of my Father in heaven. What do you think? If a shepherd had a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. So it is not the will of your Father in heaven that one of these little ones should be lost."

As you are probably well aware, this is not the way the world works. The world is constantly telling us that we are don't measure up to everyone else. We are not as rich as other people, we are not as thin as other people, we are not as smart as other people, we are not as well off as other people, the list goes on and on. We also hear all the time that 'one person can't make a difference'. But this is not the way that God feels! God loves each one of us so much, that when we are lost or hurting or struggling He 'leaves the ninety-nine' and comes to find us! And when we come to Him, He rejoices!!

Now if you are like me, you have heard this parable so many times that maybe you don't really think about it when you hear it anymore. But there was something that the voice on the radio said when I heard it a couple weeks ago that really stuck with me. He asked if the listener had ever thought about the fact when they are in times of hurt or struggle that you (YES YOU!) might be the ONE thing that God is focussing on and thinking about at that moment! I'm probably not conveying it as well as the speaker did on the radio, but it really hit me! I don't think I had ever really about it before, that God cares about ME (you) so much that when I (you) are hurting or 'lost' God might solely be focussed on me (you). It's pretty awesome to think that the God of Heaven and earth cares about me so much that for a moment in time I might be the one thing on His mind. Wow!

Here goes something...

So after some people saw Pastor Jen's blog, they encouraged me to start a blog. I had contemplated starting a blog a time or two, but thought 'What's the point? I have nothing to say.' But when I read some blogs I found out a lot of people who blog 'have nothing to say'! So I figured 'why not?' So here goes something. I plan to blog about books I am reading (I think I read 2 in the past 3-4 years), youth group Bible studies, and just thoughts I have on various subjects. I hope you'll join me on the journey!